that perfect hand…

In Ocean's 11, Danny said that "the house always wins. If you play long enough, never change the stakes, then the house takes you. Unless, when that perfect hand comes along, you bet big… and then, you take the house." Here's the hand I've been dealt, sometimes it's risky and sometimes it's safe, but all the time… it's perfect. It's mine.

mornings

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how glorious a greeting the sun gives the mountains! – john muir

Some days [disclaimer], I am not going to feel so vibrant, neither will these posts. But again, as always, we’re moving on.

Every morning my drive to work ranges from thirty-five to fifty minutes, depending on traffic. This is just one of the ways that moving back to the city has been an adjustment. For the first month of my commute, the sun was shining and I found myself grateful for the forced excuse to get up early. Calgary has had an Indian summer unlike any I’ve experienced in awhile and I let myself believe that it’s been a ‘welcome back’ gift just for me…

However, as fall has set in – even with warmer temperatures – the sun seems to less prominent during my drive to work. Last week was particularly noticeable as every morning, I left for work in the dark. My car has been covered in the remnants of colder nights and skirts without leggings already feels like a memory. There’s something quieter about these darker mornings, where it feels as though the rest of the world is still sleeping, and I need to be careful not to disturb anyone.

One thing I am finding as these days are slipping into shorter and shorter lengths of light, is that if I leave at a specific time, the sun is actually rising in my rear view mirror as I round the corner from the east of Calgary, heading west to the school. I have to go down a ramp to switch from one road to the next and if I time it right, I can go down the ramp just as the sun is rising behind me. They’re a beautiful thing, prairie skies, and best experienced for yourself, not described by a morning commuter.

It can be tough though, especially today, because the sun propels me forward and unfortunately, I just wanted to keep driving. I am not prepared to face today; a late night with work and Ken followed by parent interviews and nagging fears of replays from last year are clouding my heart. And with the sun behind my back as I drove in, I want to keep on driving until the sun sets and who knows where I would be at that point. The metaphors for that are endless but I will leave it alone.

Anyway. Thoughts from a Tuesday, sunrise filled morning… one more precious reason I’m glad my life led me here. Again.

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