that perfect hand…

In Ocean's 11, Danny said that "the house always wins. If you play long enough, never change the stakes, then the house takes you. Unless, when that perfect hand comes along, you bet big… and then, you take the house." Here's the hand I've been dealt, sometimes it's risky and sometimes it's safe, but all the time… it's perfect. It's mine.


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resignation

I’ve decided I am resigning to the things in the world that I have absolutely NO control over:

-the weather. why complain about it if it doesn’t change it?

-the size of my head. might as well adjust the hat since i can’t adjust the head.

-what other people say. i am constantly shocked by what other people say. why? i shouldn’t actually be surprised when i am not making them say it (or not making).

-my character. i can refine it or tweak it or discover it, but i can’t really change it so i might as well forget it.

-my job. i keep forgetting that i have to do as i am told. period.

-hoards of tourists. they are what and who they are. i can control my reactions to them, particularly this weekend — the elvis festival. oh, it’s that bad.

-living at home for four months. i can’t decide what’s important to my mom so i might as well go with it.

-change. it happens.

-the taste of cilantro. i try desperately to love it but really, i can’t force my tongue to enjoy it.

-routine. it creeps up on you and it’s only noticeable when something has gone awry.

-family dynamics. i swear it’s not my fault.

-priorities of others. i need patience to remember that though I am my first priority, doesn’t mean I am theirs.

how books take me elsewhere. it’s not in my power to put a book down 3 hours later and be cognizant of what went on around me in the meantime.

-the way somethings make me feel. like seeing Paul yesterday for the first time since this time last year and the year before that, i can’t help that he’s my dearest friend that i love and hate the most in my world. i try but he makes me happy and angry. i can’t control it.

-i’ve read 5 jodi picoult novels in the last 10 days. i swore i would never read her, but now that i have i’ve lost all recollection of why i said that in the first place.

-coffee loving. did you know that it’s impossible to lose your first love?

-my heart. it didn’t come with an instruction manual.

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i wish i was exaggerating pt. 2

In typical “bring Kate’s life” turn of events, my wallet has been returned to me withalmost everything in it. It was only missing my visa and cheque book and the loonie I keep in there for a rainy day when I think Americanos will finally cost less than a dollar.

 

I would just like to point out that when my car was stolen and then returned that this was the most annoying: why go through the adventure and heart attack factor of the theft and chase only to have it returned almost completely intact? I don’t get it?

Mom, Luke, my imaginary friend(s), and my coworkers seem to believe it so that I have stories to tell.

I like to believe that blessings in my life flow in abundance… even if they are as annoying as this, it’s still nice. And funny. And a nuisance. And a subject for a blog post.

 

Oh well.

Living vicariously through my own life is not giving me much clarity.


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i wish i was exaggerating

My wallet got stolen on Wednesday — somebody broke into my car and took it.

Here’s why being Kate is such an adventure…it went something like this:

I finally cracked down and decided to fix Bella, my blue little fireball of a car. (This is the same car that was broken into and the stereo stolen and the same car that was stolen herself). I’ve known for quite sometime that the CV axel and bushings (whatever those are) at the front end needed to be replaced, this knowledge heightened when the problem wore out my tires and left me stranded in Williams Lake with two flats when I was travelling home from Smithers.

So on Monday I brought my car in and on Wednesday my coworker brought me to pick it up after work. I made a deal with myself that if it cost under $650, I would go to Staples and buy an external hard drive for my computer. The work cost me $640. 43 so to Staples I went. I had called ahead of time from work so all I had to do was go to the counter and pay.

I arrived at Staples at 4:58 pm. It was pouring rain so I just grabbed my debit card out of my wallet, shoved my wallet under my gym bag, and ran into the store. (Sidenote: I don’t need the ‘don’t leave anything in your car’ lecture — you’re not allowed, see previous thefts #1 and #2… this is the first time since that I’ve left anything in Bella). When I left the store, the manager was walking in and said “Do you own a Honda Civic?” and I yelled “WHAAAAAT” thinking the little expensive disaster just got stolen AGAIN. No.

“Somebody just shimmied the lock, stole something, and ran away!” – Manager

“I saw the whole thing!” – Some lady.

“WHY DIDN’T YOU YELL!!!!” – Hysteric me.

“Well, I DIDN’T KNOW!” – Said lady.

“I am sorry.” – Me. Still hysterical.

“HE WAS WEARING A BLACK HAT AND BLUE SWEATER AND CARRYING A BAG! And he ran over there by the TD!” – Lady.

“OK. Have a nice afternoon, THANKS” – Me.

(Sidenote #2: Never try to drive a standard when you’re having a conniption. My leg was shaking so much I stalled three times.)

So what did I do? Why, what any classy, smart, level headed woman would… I went after him! I drove up by someone who fit the description and rolled down my window and said

“Can you please give me back my wallet?”

To which he responded

“I don’t have your wallet! Ha Ha Ha.” and he kept walking/running up to the crosswalk.

I am thinking This is SO NOT MY DAY. So I circled around through the Mohawk parking lot and saw that he was crossing the street into the mall parking lot. Where there is a CIBC. My bank. Oh NO he has my VISA. Oh ****! (I am not proud of this, but I was cussing in my head and probably outloud, the next few minutes are a bit of a blur). So I phoned my mom and said:

“MOM my WALLET WAS JUST STOLEN OUT OF MY CAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

“WHAT! Kate! WHAT! How?”

“Mom there’s no time, I need you to cancel my Visa RIGHT NOW.” (The stores were still open and he was heading to the mall!)

“Well, what are you doing?”

“I AM TRAILING THE GUY! I already asked him nicely now I am following him, we’re in the Cherry Lane Parking lot and I am in my car”

“Well, GET OUT THERE AND DEMAND IT BACK.”

So what do I do? Obviously. I parked, kept my mom on the line, and ran after him. That’s right, it was all of my CSI dreams come true until I had a fleeting moment where I realized I didn’t know what to do if he pulled a gun on me. I’d deal with that later and kept running. When I caught him, he was angry and said “Look, I don’t have your wallet” and pulled out his own from his back pocket. So I asked if I could look in his bag. He threw it on the ground and let me. It was filled with pop cans and bottles. My heart broke, I apologized and said he fit the description and I didn’t mean to invade his space and to have a really nice afternoon.

Anyways, I am still convinced he had it but whatever.

I went home, and mom had cancelled my Visa. If you can believe it: I left Staples at 5:04 pm. Mom had my visa cancelled at 5:13 pm. The guy tried to charge something to it at 5:18 pm. So in the matter of 14 mins (more accurately, 19 minutes from the time I arrived at Staples), I bought a hard drive, my car was broken into, my wallet stolen, I chased down a criminal (twice), my mom dealt with my bank, and I failed miserably. That was the longest 14 minutes of my life. But look how FAST things like this happen.

So the rest of the hour I was on the phone with my bank because not only was my Visa in there but my cheque book so I had to cancel my bank accounts as well! Then, because my S.I.N. card was in there I had to call the Credit Bureau(s) to flag my credit in case of fraud, and talk to the RCMP… who, sidenote #3, strongly encouraged me to buy a different vehicle given my history with her in such a short period of time!

The nice B.I.D. (blessing in disguise) to this adventure is that an hour or so after my life was flashing before my eyes, a gal from a local pub phoned to tell me she found my license underneath her car. So mom and I went to pick it up and did some dumpster diving/scouring back there before I went and met the RCMP officer in the parking lot to talk about what happened.

I am getting so tired of talking to the RCMP.

And way too used to feeling violated.

Thus begins the painful, annoying, expensive process of replacing everything that was in there. For example, my birth certificate was in my wallet because I just recently got a passport and didn’t take it out yet. For the love of fruit smoothies, that is so annoying. Along with my BCAA, Visa, S.I.N., UVic Student ID, etc. etc. etc… I don’t have time for this heinous nuisance.

On the way home from our Crime Scene Investigating, my mom says

“Kate, I just have to laugh, I think this is how your life simply is…you need the adventure”

To which I responded

“Mom, are you kidding me? It’s not like I am asking for this or walk into these sorts of things on purpose!”

But Kate, it’s not like these sorts of things surprise you anymore, either.

Good point.

But get this, along with my license, the gal found my air miles card and Save on More card under her car. HOWEVER, when we were on our way home, I turned the Save On card over and burst out laughing… it wasn’t my card! SO, either it’s from another wallet  stole OR it’s the card of the thief’s

Ergo, the saga continues… maybe they’ll start letting me ride in the squad car.

I think this picture fits well here, yet again:

Picture 79


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look up ‘idiots’ in the dictionary

Here’s an example of something that would get you shot in Penticton, Victoria, and BC as a whole. As part of my job at the Regional District I have to advocate for the environment. Not even close, actually, that’s not in my job description but after working with some of the most environementally conscious people in the entire polluted atmosphere and living in the most green, recyclable city in that said atmosphere, it starts rubbing off.

When a certain pair of pesky human beings mentioned that they still burn their garbage, I had a conniption fit/rage black out. I could hardly see straight so my weak attempt at advocating for the environment, I sent them each a magnet that said “1-2-3 Turn your key, be idle free, and SPARE OUR AIR” (because the second indication of idiocy in certain people is a love of free stuff). ANYWAYS.

They found the perfect spot for their new magnets… and sent me these two clips to prove it (see if you can find them).

The subjects of the following two videos are not named in effort to protect the not-so-innocent… but I would say that the quality of filming, the heinous background cackling by the videographer, and the shorts/hiking boot/sock/white leg combo of the star actor make them easily identifiable. Please watch the first vid first.


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renders me catatonic

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.

– Plato

He’s made an excellent point. Now just to decide which category I fit into cause honey, I’m not often at a loss for words. This could foreshadow problems to come.

Also, my baby brother recently graduated and while the gold and purple looked dashing on him, the experience caused me to reflect on my own day of white and blue a mere, disgusting six years ago. I’d like to believe I’ve come a long way. But then again, I sure enjoyed myself in those days — I hope that kinda thing lasts well into the post-ten year reunion years:

(holy smacks, please don’t judge how these pictures have been placed on this blog — they are impossible to manipulate properly, even if Trav would disagree, I am helpless).

kate the grad

my best friend and me.
my best friend and me.

we thought those gowns looked hot.
we thought those gowns looked hot.

i was scared michael would trip and fall... can you sense the concern?
i was scared michael would trip and fall… can you sense the concern?

my triple 'p': Perfect Prom-date Pete.
my triple ‘p’: Perfect Prom-date Pete.

are these dresses retro and outdated yet?

are these dresses retro and outdated yet?

entering a new phase of 'good-looking'.

entering a new phase of 'good-looking'.

nadina nailed it
nadina nailed it
more foreshadowing of things to come.
more foreshadowing of things to come.

Cue Whitesnake’s “Here I Go Again” and Mark Perry’s “Under Northern Skies” and you, I promise, will feel like you never missed a moment of Grad 2003… not entirely grossly overrated, but growing up kinda has been.