I am doing a thirty day cleanse.

No caffeine, bread, dairy, red meat, processed foods like condiments, pasta, watermelon, grapes, or sugar.

I’m doing it because I work out h-core and haven’t seen the results I want and my kinesiology specialist old roommate said I need to clean out because my body is confused by how much I am working out that it is overcompensating mumbo jumbo.

Basically, I feel like she is trying to prove how much I suck at life and am a chronic cheater, especially when someone says I can’t eat something as simple as yogurt for thirty days, my inner voice kicks in and motivates me to go eat it out of spite.

Kind of like when I cheat at Killer Bunnies.

But either way, I am cleansing.

It’s day 2 and I am ready to give Julie what-for.

I think it’s affecting my hormones because I’ve never felt so close to a total rage blackout as I do now. And it’s not even the caffeine thing. It’s the pills and instructions telling me I can’t that’s killing me.

28 more to go, think I can?