that perfect hand…

In Ocean's 11, Danny said that "the house always wins. If you play long enough, never change the stakes, then the house takes you. Unless, when that perfect hand comes along, you bet big… and then, you take the house." Here's the hand I've been dealt, sometimes it's risky and sometimes it's safe, but all the time… it's perfect. It's mine.


mitch hedberg

Sue, one of my BFFs from high school, used to download comedy for her own listening pleasure. (She might still do it, we don’t really talk about those sorts of things). Sometimes, when she would find a particularly good one, she would call me and tell me to listen to it, sometimes over the phone (?), or when I would visit her, she would play it for me and wait expectantly for me to chuckle at the right spots. I would take my cue from her and laugh when laughter glazed over her own eyes, because I honestly (sorry Sue) did not think it was funny, at all. He wasn’t crude, by other comedic standards, and my lack of enthusiasm seemed to just be another peg on my socially incapacity scale — it was really hard for me to admit that I was naive, especially when [by all appearances] I was pretty socially smart and “in”. (I am not ‘tooting my own horn’ I am just saying that our ‘group’ in high school was pretty much the conventional ‘in’ crowd, much to my 23 year old wisdom dismay, so when I struggled with things that were ‘in’ that I didn’t understand, I never admitted it, hence the need for a therapeutic blog of admitting past issues).

Also, I struggled with that comedians often sound like they are on drugs/drunk or they often laugh or crack jokes at the expense of others. Wrong. Stupid. Glorifying humour that we should stay away from. But then again, I am all for people who can poke fun at themselves.

Anyways, I didn’t think Mitch Hedberg was funny. In fact, ‘funny’ to me isn’t always what other people think is funny. Just before Christmas, Luke and Buzz and I took a study break and I brought over Superbad to watch with them. Maybe it was the 18th C Literature that was suffocating my brain, but I also didn’t find Superbad funny. In fact, I found myself stealing looks at the men to know when I should be laughing, even though when Luke started full on rage-cackling at a scene, I was thinking ‘is this guy for real?’…Luke, not the movie… I couldn’t believe they thought parts were as funny as their laughs dictated. I watched Superbad again a couple months later, on my own, and while it didn’t make me laugh out loud like it did them, I could see definite funny-possibilities once I watched it again.

I find this fascinating, because I like to think of myself pretty easygoing and always up for anything, particularly if fun is involved. But regular old 21st C hilarity is just not funny to me. I mean, some comedy is fantastic… I think we can all agree that Ellen is absolutely fantastic, I do laugh out loud at her show whenever I catch it on the TV and her stand-up DVD I must’ve watched every time I went over to Daly’s house the year after I graduated (well, maybe the two times they had rented it…but hey). But yea, it’s just not my thing. It’s almost as if movies or comedy are almost forced humour, and I can’t seem to get over that they are standing up in front of an audience and their whole purpose is to be funny. It’s almost as if I don’t want to give them the satisfaction of my laughter because I refuse to let people make money or entertain by physically trying to be funny. So even if a part of me wants to LOL, my psyche refuses.

Therefore, when people put me on the spot and say ‘hey Kate, check this out!’ I cringe because 9/10 times it’s either comedy, like Mitch Hedberg, that I struggle laughing at, something stupid that a human being has done that I will laugh laugh laugh at to a point where the person showing me questions my morality, or a dumb movie that is so absolutely hideous that I start getting angry that I wasted a moment watching it.

People, time is something we cannot get back.

Although, I do love this quote from one of Mitch Hedberg’s finer moments:

“I’m sick of following my dreams. I’m just going to ask them where they’re goin’, and hook up with them later.”

(Please respect the fact that this blog is A: a matter of personal opinion and B: does not, by any means, serve to inhibit you from showing me ‘funny’ things… I Just needed to create a safe haven so I don’t have to keep pretending anymore and C: like many things, is completely blown out of proportion).